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Fight of the Valkyries!

“And Action!” I yelled into the microphone.   Nicolas Cage roared. “And the whole time…you stand there…with this who-me…expression…on your FACE!”   “Cut! That’s from Trapped In Paradise, 1994? Nic, can you stick to the script?”   “I am sticking to the script,” Cage said, “Just not yours! Who wrote this? My Manager told me we were rebooting Left Behind to …

Thunder Bowl!

The Pope handed me my ball, a 9-lb Hammer Doom. I slipped my fingers into her three willing holes and rested the ball against my chin. My last thought before passing out from alcohol poisoning was a line from my adopted father, Mickey Spillane, “Alright, I’ll play ball but I’m going to make up a lot …